I have a dream...

I dream of writing the words that jump off a page. I dream of writing the phrases that capture people's hearts. I dream of changing the world. Being happy. Joyous and prosperous. I dream of loving whole-heartedly and never losing the passion in my heart. I dream of a day in 50 years when the glimmer of hope in my eyes is still visible to everyone I meet. Of knowing that what I'm doing is what's right for me even if it's not what is right for others. I dream of true love. Love that is patient, love that is kind. Love that never ends. I dream the dream of joy.

There's a storm rolling in, blacker than sin on a Sunday, rolling in to cover the sky and shadow the ground in hues of gray and black. Bringing darkness with it, darkness that hides the sun and frightens the children. The temperature drops slowly, degree by degree, bidding you to crawl into bed and duck under the covers to return on a sunnier day. Rain pounds the window panes,a flash of lightning, a clap of thunder. The sounds of the storm as much a part of it as the storm itself. There's a storm rolling in.

Find Your Light

"Find your light!" says my director everyday. Of course, she means it in the most literal sense. Stand in the light of the spotlight to make sure the audience can see your face, your expression, your movements. But maybe there's more to finding your light than that. "Find your light." The light in your eyes that sparks up when you're doing the thing you love most. When your smile lights up a room. The light that comes from the fire in your heart. A light of joy. A light of passion. A light of love. When the darkness is all around you, and it's overwhelming and consuming, a light that saves you. "Find your light" and never look back.

Mask yourself, my Princess
And find yourself a Frog
The streets tonight, so full of fools
You mustn't stay out too long
The night of tricks the night of treats
This night of playing games
And all the lies, they glamorize this night of short, sweet fame
Enjoy it now, because it's here
wander the streets and smile
A Princess tonight, you will be
if only for a little while...

Halloween has come, but Halloween must go
as quickly as it arrived
But a lovely time of treats and laughs, have from it derived
So gather your treaures and make your way home
The time has come, tis true
So remove your mask, but still make yourself a Princess in all that you do.

Where the Wild Things are...

The Wild Things are in a magical world of wonder. The Wild Things are my biggest fans. The Wild Things color my dreams with adventures and magic. The Wild Things make me smile.

The glue on my crown is still drying, so I cannot yet transform into Max. But my costume is pretty fabulous. Halloween makes me smile, and all the better when I can be the greatest person who ever lived.

The Wild Things are wild, and perfect, and loving, and special. I hope they like me ;)

Georgia National Fair

Once a year, every year, in the beautiful season of fall a magical thing comes to our state. The Georgia National Fair. Everything about the fair feels different from the rest of the world. Be it the lights, the sounds, the smells. The place where people go to free their minds.

The Georgia National Fair. Where when you walk in the north gate you can almost taste the five pounds you'll gain throughout the week. The epitome of hilarity, joy, and smiles. Flip flops thwack against the Midway and people loose their minds waiting in line for Fireball or filling out release forms for Speed.
The Georgia National Fair. The only place in the world where you can find a booth selling Fried Dough on every corner and anything you wish to buy you can buy it on a stick.




So come to the Georgia National Fair, where all your dreams can come true. I can guarantee you'll never be bored.

Do you ever wish?

In a night sky full of stars, do you ever want to wish on every single one? I wish I was happier, I wish I had more time, I wish I had a puppy, I wish my car would start, I wish I knew what to do, I wish I could make you smile...



In a night full of stars, I wish for you, on every single one...

People Always Leave

The truth of that statement is self-evident. It is not in the nature of people to stay where they are, to not move around, chase dreams, chase life.
People always leave.
They might return. They might leave again. Then they might never come back.
People always leave.
So what seems to be the better option? Do we protect ourselves from the pain of loss, and keep people far away? Not letting anyone in to see who we are, to see our problems, and our hearts. Or do we hold them close, hoping for the best? With aching hearts, remembering the good times and the not so good, but never letting them out of our lives.
People always leave.
I think I'll choose to live with the pain and keep my memories.

Its been quite a while since my last post...Quite a while indeed.

I know you must miss my wit and charm, so I have returned.

A lot has happened. School is crazy, busy, and exhausting. I loathe Personal Fitness with all that is within me. Homecoming is this evening, in more ways than one. School homecoming, pretty dresses and dancing isnt for me. I'll spend tonight doing better things than that. And homecoming in another way, my Marine is coming home.

If I told you how excited I was, you still wouldnt understand.

Lets chat about reunion

Reunion. Coming soon.

Saturday.

Can everyone get pumped about the reunion?

Pretty please?

OK: How good it will be to be reunited with you. Excitement. Hugs and love.

4 days.

See you then.

<3

Wear TOMS.

They're good for the world.

What in the world would life be like all alone?
If I didnt have my best friend, or any of my friends?
If you didnt have any of yours?

My heart is broken, severed into many pieces.
Life goes on.
Friends come, they go. Unfortunately, they go.

Letters

Writing a letter.
But how do I tell you what I mean? How I get you to understand how I'm feeling, how much I miss you, and wish you could be home?

How do I tell you how worried I am?
A page of words cant substitute for our long drives, and late night calls.

A month passed. Nearly two now.
You left, a brother and a best friend, You'll return a Marine, a brother, and still a best friend.
I can only pray that my letter from home reaches you safely and that you read my words, and feel my love, and know how I miss you, and remember the fun times, and the not so fun times.

That time we went to Sonic and I drank all your strawberry limeade.
When I found out you'd been drinking.
Bus rides, and camps.
The last time we hung out.
Saying goodbye...

Tonight

Tonight is my first night of serious high school homework.

So much to do, so little time. So of course, I use that time to blog about the homework I should be doing.

Overwhelmed with homework, what to do first, what's most important? Should I study for the test before I do the vocab, since it's worth more points?

And after I figure all this out, is it time to actually get the work done?

You know, my basic analytical mind at work.

Justin disrupts my homework and gives me a break from the work I've barely started.

Here's the issue: I have too many thoughts. And with too many thoughts, how can you focus on the one track of Spanish, or Lit, or Civics? Well, let me just tell you, you can't.

So intstead I'll think back to the sunrise in Jamaica...and deal with tomorrow, tomorrow.

The Best Friend

I was just alerted that I have not made one single post dedicated to my best friend. He's insulted.

Benjamin.

What a fantastic person. We laugh, and cry, and dominate life together in a very awesome style that only best friends like us could accomplish. He talks like Sid the Sloth and that always makes me laugh, and we chat all night on the Book of Faces. I adore his family, what marvelous folks. Ben is epic. Ben embodies maturity, sensitivity, fun, lightheartedness, and joy.

The grandest bus buddy on earth. I knew you were destined for greatness when I could spend 9 hours sitting next to you and not feel bored one time. The memories overflow in my mind.

I love you, best friend.

The random thoughts...

I am terrified of my alarm clock. Just so you know. I wake up each morning before it goes off, and then hit snooze only to lie in my bed thinking "When is it going to go off?" The sound makes me jump, even when it's Mayday Parade.

I've decided to drink a ton more water this school year. It's healthy and delicious.

Mmmm...Aqua.

P.E. makes me want to commit suicide. 1st period, each morning. What a waste of getting ready for school. 16 more weeks till that's over forever.

I hate college, it took all my friends away. Thanksgiving mocks me with its distance.

Labor Day will arrive quickly though. <3

Don't you wish that I had something of substance to write about. Well to be perfectly honest.

So do I.

But substance seems to be lacking as of late.

School is monotonous. People the same. Sad thing is, there's no room for substance in monotony.

My right lung left for Lynchburg this week, and what a sad thing that was. Of course, my right lung is safely fastened in my body, but when someone you love leaves, it feels as though you have lost something vital. Something you cannot survive without.

But of course I will survive. Thanksgiving isnt too far off.

Carolina is thrilled.

Genuinely happy. Giddy with smiles.
It's funny how one thing, one compliment if you will, can change the look on someones face so drastically that they suddenly overflow with happiness.


Have you made someone smile today?
Have you smiled today?

The real me is better than the one you see, who struggles to conform to the pattern, and the normal. The real me has passion for a purpose that was made for me and me alone. The real me will not be perfect in the eyes of those who judge, but will hold tight to the belief that the real me does not have to conform, does not have to fit the standards set, and does not have to work to be who you want me to be, but will only be who I am. Unfortunantly,you do not seeThe Real Me :)

And then there was one...

Do you ever feel like everything that you believe in is falling apart? And that maybe, all the people who used to stand so tall seem to be shrinking away?

There used to be The one I could talk to.

The one I could listen to.

The one I laughed with.

The one who was up for anything.

And now where are they? Where am I?

Who am I?

So, you want to know a secret? I just freaked out.

WHAT am I going to DO with my LIFE?

Yes, sure. I have options. I mean, I could be a professional best friend:

Or I could be a construction worker:

The model option is still open:

Im a pretty awesome elephant, if I do say so myself:

But let's get real. If I could, I'd take pictures and listen to music everyday. But that's not very legit.

Maybe I'll do it anyway...Who knows?

Hmmm...

Hmmm...

What is this building doing in the backyard of a church in Jamaica?

Why is it beautiful to me?

It makes me wonder, what happened here? Who was here, why?

Im overwhelmed with questions.

So I go in.

There was one thing here. Just one. A chair. Old, and paint stained, but beautiful.

Did someone sit here? Did they watch the sunset over the mountains that lie just outside the doorway? Or did they stand, and look out the window? You've seen the window...

Did they look out, and wonder what went wrong with their life or did they look out and feel joyful for their family, friends, day?

I just have to wonder...

Oh my junk, I love this girl. Sitting on this roof top, she wasnt loving it. But in my opinion, we still werent close enough to the stars.

I still think we should have jumped off, into the pool, but for your sake, I let us climb back down. Next summer though, prepare for the jump darling :)

Contemplation

They say that eyes are a window to the soul.

For all intents and purposes, a window is an opening. To let in, and to let out. When your window is in good condition, you can see what is happening on either side of the window. But what if your window's broken? All jagged edges and shattered glass? What happens then? Do you let too much out, or keep too much in? Maybe it hurts people to see something that could be a beautiful, funtioning item broken like that...